Serena Williams Phone Thief, The abundantly attentive Serena Williams aggregate a adventure on her Facebook page on Wednesday that declared her accepting the best of a ambitious bandit while dining at a Chinese restaurant. Here, we allotment the unedited adventure (in bold).
Soooooo bygone at banquet the CRAZIEST THING happened to me. I was sitting adequate some Chinese aliment (delicious may I add) and this guy stands next to me. It was alone 2 of us sitting at a 4 being table just chatting like we accept not apparent anniversary added in years. Anyways I digress, so this guy is continuing next to me and something (I accept now dubbed it my SUPERHERO sense) told me to watch him. My buzz was sitting in the armchair but I just didn’t feel right.
Okay, there’s your aboriginal mistake. Who leaves a buzz on a chair? That’s like an allurement to overlook it and again accept anyone acquisition it, able the countersign and again bribery you like that one time Samir from Office Space did it to Liz Lemon.
He was there too long. “Is he a customer?” I anticipation “Is he cat-and-mouse on the bathroom?” nonetheless I approved to agitate his this awesome feeling. However, I kept watching him from the bend of my eye. Than if atomic accepted low and catch this accepted petty bandit affective my buzz and apace left.
Well, I’m traveling to not go as “low” in attending him as a common, petty thief. So far, he seems like a amazing thief. SO FAR. He scouted his mark, he affective the buzz and, for a abrupt moment, he got away.
I looked at the chair, than shouted “Omg that dude took my phone!!”
This is area it goes south for our thief. Also, amuse acquaint me Serena in fact said “OMG” while acumen the force of the situation. If she loses her buzz at the end of this adventure and anyone get her adage OMG on camera, I’ll buy Serena a new phone.
Not cerebration I reacted (hence the superwoman photo) I jumped up, weaved my way in and out of the comfortable restaurant (leaping over a armchair or two) and chased him down. He began to run but I was too fast. (Those sprints came in handy) I was aloft him in a flash!
But this is area he turns into not a common, petty thief, but a moron. How are you traveling to outrun Serena Williams? Unless you’re Usain Bolt, you’re not accepting away. And area are they active all over this Chinese restaurant anyway? How big is it? And bethink if “stealing a phone” in a Chinese restaurant meant something altered entirely?
In the a lot of alarming yet calm no nonsense articulation I could aggregation I attentive asked him if he “accidentally” took the amiss phone.
If you’ve anytime heard Serena acknowledgment a brainless catechism from the columnist (or one she deems stupid), you can abutting your eyes and apprehend her adage this.
He stumbled on his words apparently not assured this to happen. While he was cerebration of the appropriate affair to say and eventually he said “Gosh you apperceive what I did! It was so ambagious in there. I accept to accept affective the amiss phone.”Meanwhile My buzz was ringing, my superhero accessory quailman was face timing me so he could not possibly abjure the allegations. I apace thanked him and left.
Wait, who was FaceTiming her? Was it Drake? Or Venus? Or Caroline Wozniacki? And why couldn’t this bandit accept Drake in his phone. Maybe they went to Degrassi together! Quailman, according to Wikipedia, is the name of Doug’s adapt ego from the activated appearance Doug. He’s basically the aforementioned as Doug, but has a Q on his chest. Given Serena’s adulation of adapt egos maybe she was calling, gasp, herself?! And who was she bistro banquet with? This is why Serena is so maddening. She’s assuredly giving us a acceptable adventure about her claimed activity and can’t even bead the one section of advice humans affliction about.
Superhero? Maybe? Or HELL YEA!! I’ve got the acceleration the jumps, the power, the body, the seduction, the sex appeal, the strength, the administration and yet the calm to acclimate the storm.
That sounds like a band from Uma Thurman’s bootless Fox Force Five pilot from Pulp Fiction. No one bare a admonition that you are a badass, Serena, abnormally if it comes in the anatomy of block down some crooked chucklehead.
Always accept to your superhero close voice. Always accumulate your things close! Action for what’s right. Angle for what you accept in! Be a superhero!
If what you accept in is that your buzz shouldn’t be baseborn by some moron, again action for your appropriate to not accept that happen!
When I got aback into the restaurant I accustomed a continuing ovation. I was proud. I just showed every man in there I can angle up to bully’s and added men. It was a win for the ladies!
I agreement you every man and woman in there had no agnosticism about that. You are the greatest changeable amateur in the apple which, therefore, makes you a bigger amateur than — and this is a low appraisal — 99.5% of men. Serena, while this is cool, you’ve had affluence of bigger wins for “the ladies. Accepting the best of a annoyer is like the 800th a lot of absorbing affair you’ve done.
Just because you are a adult don’t be abashed to footfall up to any claiming and not be a victim but a hero! SuperSerena and her accessory quailman
Also, this dude absolutely didn’t wish to abduct Serena’s buzz in the way that he’d wish to abduct my buzz or your phone. Chances are it was a paparazzo or anyone with access at TMZ who capital to see if they could assuredly affirm the Drake-Serena rumors. Or the Reddit guy-Serena rumors. Or all the Serena rumors, I don’t know. Maybe alpha with “who’s Quailman?”
Soooooo bygone at banquet the CRAZIEST THING happened to me. I was sitting adequate some Chinese aliment (delicious may I add) and this guy stands next to me. It was alone 2 of us sitting at a 4 being table just chatting like we accept not apparent anniversary added in years. Anyways I digress, so this guy is continuing next to me and something (I accept now dubbed it my SUPERHERO sense) told me to watch him. My buzz was sitting in the armchair but I just didn’t feel right.
Okay, there’s your aboriginal mistake. Who leaves a buzz on a chair? That’s like an allurement to overlook it and again accept anyone acquisition it, able the countersign and again bribery you like that one time Samir from Office Space did it to Liz Lemon.
He was there too long. “Is he a customer?” I anticipation “Is he cat-and-mouse on the bathroom?” nonetheless I approved to agitate his this awesome feeling. However, I kept watching him from the bend of my eye. Than if atomic accepted low and catch this accepted petty bandit affective my buzz and apace left.
Well, I’m traveling to not go as “low” in attending him as a common, petty thief. So far, he seems like a amazing thief. SO FAR. He scouted his mark, he affective the buzz and, for a abrupt moment, he got away.
I looked at the chair, than shouted “Omg that dude took my phone!!”
This is area it goes south for our thief. Also, amuse acquaint me Serena in fact said “OMG” while acumen the force of the situation. If she loses her buzz at the end of this adventure and anyone get her adage OMG on camera, I’ll buy Serena a new phone.
Not cerebration I reacted (hence the superwoman photo) I jumped up, weaved my way in and out of the comfortable restaurant (leaping over a armchair or two) and chased him down. He began to run but I was too fast. (Those sprints came in handy) I was aloft him in a flash!
But this is area he turns into not a common, petty thief, but a moron. How are you traveling to outrun Serena Williams? Unless you’re Usain Bolt, you’re not accepting away. And area are they active all over this Chinese restaurant anyway? How big is it? And bethink if “stealing a phone” in a Chinese restaurant meant something altered entirely?
In the a lot of alarming yet calm no nonsense articulation I could aggregation I attentive asked him if he “accidentally” took the amiss phone.
If you’ve anytime heard Serena acknowledgment a brainless catechism from the columnist (or one she deems stupid), you can abutting your eyes and apprehend her adage this.
He stumbled on his words apparently not assured this to happen. While he was cerebration of the appropriate affair to say and eventually he said “Gosh you apperceive what I did! It was so ambagious in there. I accept to accept affective the amiss phone.”Meanwhile My buzz was ringing, my superhero accessory quailman was face timing me so he could not possibly abjure the allegations. I apace thanked him and left.
Wait, who was FaceTiming her? Was it Drake? Or Venus? Or Caroline Wozniacki? And why couldn’t this bandit accept Drake in his phone. Maybe they went to Degrassi together! Quailman, according to Wikipedia, is the name of Doug’s adapt ego from the activated appearance Doug. He’s basically the aforementioned as Doug, but has a Q on his chest. Given Serena’s adulation of adapt egos maybe she was calling, gasp, herself?! And who was she bistro banquet with? This is why Serena is so maddening. She’s assuredly giving us a acceptable adventure about her claimed activity and can’t even bead the one section of advice humans affliction about.
Superhero? Maybe? Or HELL YEA!! I’ve got the acceleration the jumps, the power, the body, the seduction, the sex appeal, the strength, the administration and yet the calm to acclimate the storm.
That sounds like a band from Uma Thurman’s bootless Fox Force Five pilot from Pulp Fiction. No one bare a admonition that you are a badass, Serena, abnormally if it comes in the anatomy of block down some crooked chucklehead.
Always accept to your superhero close voice. Always accumulate your things close! Action for what’s right. Angle for what you accept in! Be a superhero!
If what you accept in is that your buzz shouldn’t be baseborn by some moron, again action for your appropriate to not accept that happen!
When I got aback into the restaurant I accustomed a continuing ovation. I was proud. I just showed every man in there I can angle up to bully’s and added men. It was a win for the ladies!
I agreement you every man and woman in there had no agnosticism about that. You are the greatest changeable amateur in the apple which, therefore, makes you a bigger amateur than — and this is a low appraisal — 99.5% of men. Serena, while this is cool, you’ve had affluence of bigger wins for “the ladies. Accepting the best of a annoyer is like the 800th a lot of absorbing affair you’ve done.
Just because you are a adult don’t be abashed to footfall up to any claiming and not be a victim but a hero! SuperSerena and her accessory quailman
Also, this dude absolutely didn’t wish to abduct Serena’s buzz in the way that he’d wish to abduct my buzz or your phone. Chances are it was a paparazzo or anyone with access at TMZ who capital to see if they could assuredly affirm the Drake-Serena rumors. Or the Reddit guy-Serena rumors. Or all the Serena rumors, I don’t know. Maybe alpha with “who’s Quailman?”
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